This short article appeared in China Times right before 
Valentine 2001. My translation below isn't exactly faithful.
Well, I just couldn't resist.  It is funny in its own way, 
but you probably need to be Chinese and have read the two 
famed novels "Dreams of the Red Chamber" and "Journey West" 
to fully appreciate the humor.  In any case, it appears that
Bill Clinton would also be very popular in China.

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Men love Xie-bao-chai and women love Zhu-ba-jie

Valentine is near and who are the dream lovers for the 
men and women in mainland China?  Surprisingly, it is not 
the morally up-straight Tang-sheng, nor is it the delicate 
and fragile Ling-dai-yue, but the some what horny pig 
Zu-ba-jie and the politically savvy Xie-bao-chai.  They
are the two most beloved dream lovers.

Shanghai's Labor Daily recently conducted a survey using 
the beauties of "Dreams of the Red Chamber" and the four 
main characters in "Journey West".  People were asked to 
choose their ideal mates among them.  From men, the sweet 
and classy Xie-bao-chai won with 5679 votes.  The ambitious 
and energetic Wang-xi-feng got the second place with 2839 
votes.  Third place went to the cute and smart Qing-weng 
with 1894 votes.  The loyal Xi-ren got 985.  Even the 
shrewd wife of Bao-er (Bao-er-jia-de) got 103 votes.  
The out of the world Ling-dai-yue got a mere 5 votes.
 
For the four characters in Journey West, among the 98 
women, nobody chose Tang-sheng; 10 picked the monkey; 
14 picked Sha-sheng, but an astounding 74 votes went 
to the pig.

When asked why they didn't choose Ling-dai-yue, men said:  

"She is always ill.  I will be serving her instead of 
the other way round.  She is very jealous and with a sharp 
tongue.  Will write depressing poems and paint weird stuff 
with the slightest provocation and is a bit of a bookworm.  
She is too sensitive, too idealistic and too naive.  Also she 
thinks she is better than everyone else.  Of course, 
Xie-bao-chai is the best.  She understands people and their 
weaknesses; is politically savvy, tolerant and willing to 
compromise.  Let's say I get drunk and come home late.  She 
would understand if I was entertaining the boss or a customer.  
Can you imagine what Ling-dai-yue's reaction would be?"

As to why women loved the pig, they said: 

"Tang-sheng?  Don't make me laugh.  He can't do anything 
and is totally useless.  When danger comes, he gets all 
scared and all he knows is pray.  What a wuss and a sissy.  
There is not a single manly fibre in him.  Some pretty girl 
winks at him and he turns to pieces.  What an idiot.

The monkey is no good either.  He has the manner of a low 
class street gang.  A workaholic and all he knows is how 
to kiss up to his boss.  Always on business trips and is 
out 108,000 miles at the drop of a hat.  Doesn't give a 
damn about his family, wife and kids.  Sha-sheng is such a
country bumpin--too faithful, nice and obedient.  Doesn't 
understand women's feelings and is totally bland.  Would 
he ever take me to a wild party, for example?

The pig is the best.  Sure he is ugly, but is also cute 
and sweet and has feelings.  He is very capable, cares 
about his family, knows how to enjoy a good life, very 
forgiving and seldomly gets mad.  Ok, he is a sweet-talker
and likes to take advantages of others, but in this day 
and age, a man like that is a winner.  I believe even his 
boss likes him.  Granted he had a few sex scandals in his 
past and is always looking at other women, but that only 
shows his virility.  He knows how to please women and how 
to put romance in mundane daily lives.  Such a man invokes 
powerful romantic feelings in me and perhaps a bit of 
jealousy too.  Oh, he is so adorable."